Gone, But Not Forgotten

January 30, 2012 Holly Sivec

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHytuO8xVkw[/youtube] I hear the sound of an orchestra tuning, and decades-old memories of sending out the concert C come rushing back. Creating a sonorous slice through the audience's chatter with my oboe, followed by the hush. The anticipation. Theirs. Mine. Ours. A symphony unto itself.

Long skirts and crisp white blouses at Alice Tully Hall. Matching blazers and Russian Christmas Music at Woolsey Hall. Sharing pizzas in New Haven. Soaking my reeds in one of my father's old film canisters. Humming melodies. Dreaming of the Boston Pops.

This jumble of noise, the vibration of everybody matching their pitch to me, filled me with equal parts fear and confidence. Leading the pack and blending in all at once.

Even though my orchestra years are long behind me, it's a role I find myself still playing to this day, in work and in life. I set the foundation and then retreat, only to occasionally and precisely--deliberately--be heard.

Swells and dips. Crescendo and pianissimo. Quality not quantity. Always.

This Thing I Love: Fiddlin’ Around

December 7, 2010 Holly Sivec

[youtube]SBSnR4ZP2MI[/youtube] Oh, Pandora—you sneaky l’il matchmaker, you. Thank you for acquainting me with Ray LaMontagne. With Nickel Creek. Mick McAuley, too.

You noticed that I keep giving the thumbs-up to the artists with smoky, bluesy voices who bring a catchy beat to their tunes. Iron & Wine. The Swell Season. Joshua Radin. Bonus points for eloquent lyrics and the dips and swells of a violin accompaniment. Soulful music that catches me off guard and settles into me, deep. Transports me. Gives structure to feeling. Humbles me.

"Don't look for love in faces, places. It's in you, that's where you'll find kindness." --Ray LaMontagne

Playlist: On Your Way

October 11, 2010 Holly Sivec

Without the to-dos and distractions of the day all around me, my trusty yoga mat allows me to find my purpose—my raison d’être—time and again.

Tonight, cushioned by the unity and solitude of a room full of yogis, my breath merges with mantra:

I am . . . I can . . . I will . . . I did . . .

And then, this song comes up on the playlist—a sign, perhaps, from the iPod gods that everything is as it should be.

_________________________________________________________________________ © 2010 Good Karma Housekeeping. Because you need not know your final destination in order to be on your way. (Photo by Em Kâ Bé via Creative Commons.)

Playlist: Just Purr and Sing Along

September 20, 2010 Holly Sivec

[youtube]Lhop9Pd4xfQ[/youtube] Ah, the Meow Meow Lullaby. Such a silly, simple, sweet song. Makes me smile every time I hear it. Reminds me of my own little fella . . .

Definitely an atypical tune from Nada Surf. Most of the videos out there for the song are of some scrappy concert footage, tots and tweens giving it a go, and slideshows cobbled together from Google images. The link above was the best of the bunch. Be sure to listen close to the end of the song. Melts the ol’ heart.

* * *

I stumbled across this blog post, On Losing a Beloved Pet, from Christine Kane last summer and promptly bookmarked it—after reading it twice and shedding a few tears, of course.

It’s about guilt and second guessing and knowing (or not knowing) when “it’s time.” It’s about life and the gift of time, surrender and experiencing the release of this furry being you treasure.

If you’re a pet parent, bookmark it. If you have friends who are pet parents, bookmark it for them. The wisdom runs deep. In the meantime, just purr and sing along . . .

Playlist: Don’t Forget to Breathe

September 9, 2010 Holly Sivec

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This song has been on one of my yoga instructor’s playlists all summer—and in my head (in a good way!) for just as long.

From the first strum of Alexi Murdoch’s guitar in that first downward-facing dog of the day, I can feel the stress just slide off of my body. Ahhh . . . the beauty of deep, slow, complete breaths.