It's inevitable. Get a group of females together and before long the conversation will shift to one (or both) of the following topics: marriage and babies. Even still, after a decade-plus of answering these questions, they make me squirm. It's exhausting being in the minority. Though I've noticed, the older I get, the more often I find that I'm not alone in choosing to sit out these rites of passage. And the more at ease I feel with these decisions.
There's a line in one of my favorite movies, Good Will Hunting, where Will and Skylar are just about to make plans to go out on a date. Skylar says, "Maybe we could go out for coffee sometime," and Will's responds with "Great, or maybe we could go somewhere and just eat a bunch of caramels." Their simple transaction so perfectly makes my point.
So often we gravitate toward doing things just because it sounds like the right thing to do--or because it's what's expected of you and the situation you're in--not because it's what we truly want to do. Why is that?
Had I fallen in love with someone else, I very well may have gone the marriage and babies route. Would it have been right for me? I'm inclined to think not. Not everybody's a coffee drinker, so to speak. But that doesn't make coffee bad. Or good. Though it sure is nice to have options.
_________________________________________________________________________ © 2009 Good Karma Housekeeping. Making the space--mentally and physically--to live happily ever after.
